Svitlana (name changed) is a 34-year-old mother of two. A few years ago, she felt lighthearted and cheerful. She calmly faced difficulties, was in touch with herself and her desires, and had the inner balance and resources to cope with everyday challenges.
Gradually, Svitlana's state began to change. After her second maternity leave, as she said, “my mind became chaotic.” Returning to work was accompanied by criticism, which had a painful effect on her self-esteem. Her level of anxiety was increasing, her self-confidence was becoming lower, and her energy and sense of purpose disappeared over time. Svitlana increasingly doubted herself, did not understand what she wanted, and did not feel her own value. Negative thoughts, emotional exhaustion, and a feeling of inner emptiness became her companions. An additional factor was external circumstances related to the war in the country, which intensified the feeling of instability.
At some point, Svitlana noticed that she had lost touch with herself. She realized that she did not know what she loved or what her strengths were. She could easily list her shortcomings, but could not see any of her strengths. She stopped dreaming and fantasizing about the future, and instead, she constantly found herself being anxious and feeling as though her life had stopped. Svitlana even consulted a psychiatrist and was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder, but she did not dare to start medication because of fear and doubt for a long time.
In search of support, the woman turned to the NGO Girls, where she had the opportunity to work with a psychologist. During psychological counseling, she gradually became aware of her emotional states and developed new ways of responding. An important part of the process was understanding how anxiety affected the brain, why tension and symptoms arose. This helped Svitlana to look at her condition differently and perceive medication as a resource for recovery, rather than a sign of weakness. Although the psychiatrist also explained this, it was precisely because of the trust, calmness, and understanding that were in the therapy with the psychologist from the NGO Girls that Svitlana decided to have another consultation with a specialist and make the decision to begin treatment. She gradually began to notice positive changes, such as reduced levels of anxiety, greater emotional stability, and growing inner strength.
A significant part of the work was devoted to negative automatic thoughts. Svitlana learned to notice and record them, and create cognitive cycles using CBT techniques to understand the connection between thoughts, emotions, and behavior. Over the course of several sessions, she practiced distancing techniques, observing her thoughts without merging with them, learning to see them as assumptions rather than facts.
During the consultations, she also explored her basic emotional needs and how they influenced the formation of deep-seated attitudes about herself and her own worth. This helped her to better understand herself, her own reactions, and the sources of her insecurity.
Svitlana gradually became more confident and calm. She started going to the gym, taking better care of herself, and noticing things that brought her joy. If the world seemed gray and colorless to her before, it was becoming more colorful over time. Svitlana took criticism more easily, saw value in her work, and began to accept herself.
“Svitlana showed high motivation and involvement in the process. She worked on herself systematically, completed tasks, analyzed a lot, and looked for her own ways to distance herself from internal criticism. A comprehensive approach with a combination of psychological support, medication, physical activity, and self-reflection yielded lasting results,“ says a psychologist from the NGO Girls.
At the end of this journey, Svitlana began to think about the future once again, namely, her desire to develop, plan, and set goals. Summarizing her changes, Svitlana shared, “I like my new state. Now I know what I want and how I want it. And I am enough for myself.”
Support is provided in the project “Strengthening adolescent and youth participation and employability through youth work and enhancing youth policy in hromadas of Kyiv, Zhytomyr and Chernihiv regions” implemented by the NGO Girls with the support of UNICEF Ukraine and the German Federal Ministry for Economic Cooperation and Development (BMZ) through the German state development bank KfW.
